Unintentional Improvisations of Everyday Life

Gotta love the Brits

2009-10-11T18:37:00.003+01:00

Sad news emerged this morning, the death of Boyzone band member Stephen Gateley in Majorca, you know how I found out. No not the conventional methods, I got a text when I woke up from a mate of mine:

"Stephen Gately dead eh?

What a bummer..."

What I love about the British people is our sense of humour, no matter what the global disaster or death, there's always someone out there who's thinking of the funny side of things. Ok there must be tons of people out there who think we're sick and need help. But I guess humour is one of the way we get through the hard times. I mean, how much does a damn good laugh cheer you up after a long hard day. It's something that most other cultures and nationalitys will never understand. And yes i'm guilty!

Been a long weekend for me, I got my new bike on Friday, decided to bike to work on Saturday. As I was coming down a fairly steep hill, doing about 20mph, I got cocky and decided to hit the path. Hit it at the wrong angle, and sort of ploughed into a wall. My bike was in worse condition then I was, one of the brake pads was knackered, and both tyres were damaged. It's cost me £40 but I can live with that. Lucky that I haven't broken anything. Apart from alot of aches and pains today, a badly bruised shoulder and finger, i'm fairly alright. The bloke in Halfords spoke my language, he said "You were seeing how fast you were getting it to go weren't you?!", and yep yep I probably was. Maybe next time i'll not be so cocky, and be more careful.

Some good news, which is fairly scarce at the moment. I passed my security training, and am now in the process of getting my badge. This year's been weird, I know tons of people who will agree with this, it's just been full of shit, it has actually been a really crap year, very little has come or gone my way. I'm looking forward to 2010, let's hope its better than 2009. Anyway, i'm off to have a bath and sooth my aching body. Anyone want to scrub my back? Hello? Anyone?

2009-09-28T21:53:00.000+01:00

Now she's calm, looking smart and making thousands.

2009-09-28T18:25:00.003+01:00

The G20 protests have once again hit the press today, along with the critism of the police's handling of it. It's very interesting reading this now, after doing my security and physical intervention course this weekend, i've been taught all the procedures and techniques which the police use so in a way I look at things like this situation very differently. The PC involved in the apparently "assault" has today been charged by the CPS with assault and is being taken to court.

Take a look at the above video which around about 22 secs shows the incident starting. The unemployed, benefit seeking woman from Brighton is twice told to "Step Back", and being warned about her behaviour. She continues to swear and shout abuse at the police officer, and also pushes him at one point. You're taught in your physical intervention course that you should use reasonable and minimum force, and you're allowed to strike the first blow if you feel threatened. This woman entered the officers "intimate space" having already been warning twice about her behaviour, she continued to be aggresive, what does she think is going to happen.

The back hand which the officer uses is a technique which is an initial way of getting someone to back off, I do not think he deliberately went for her face, I think this was an accident. Even after this she continued to be aggressive and abusive to this officer, so his next option was either his CS spray or the batton, he went for the batton. At this point she gets the message.

Personally I believe this woman should be issued with a section 5 public order for her behaviour. The officer now has to explain the situation to a jury, explain why he thought that the force he used against this woman was reasonable and minimum. The woman was warned twice before force was used, and she ignored the warnings, maybe she'll think again next time. It's better to be heard by 12 than carried by 6. I'm not going to get into my opinions of this woman, I will just say that I think she should get a job and do something more worthwhile, but i'm sure she's made enough to keep her going for a few years from her stories in the papers.

On another note, why the hell is Scott Mills on Radio 1 starting to play christmas songs, I swear the next one he plays i'll be writing a complaint to the beeb. It's too bloody early, and ruins the spirit of it all.

A softy at heart

2009-09-20T15:16:00.002+01:00

It's rare that something as heart wrenching as this makes me want to do an immediate blogpost but this quite touched me just now. I was driving back having done a few errands, when I drove past a old woman standing outside her house with what I presume was a friend of hers, clearly looking quite distressed. Lying in her arms, was this black and white cat, the cat looked quite worse for wear, in fact I'd say there was very little life in it. In a matter of seconds, i'd pretty much confidently established that this was probably a little old lady who's best friend was this little creature, and she was in the process of losing it.

I've got two cats, both of which I annoy till the cows come home, but both of which I am quite fond of and wouldn't like to lose (i'm sure they feel very differently). It is amazing how we can get so close to animals, and how we can build so many strong bonds with them, I guess when we get older, these animals are our best friends, the creatures we see on a daily basis, the ones that no matter how sad we get or how much we annoy them, they'll still come and cuddle up on your lap on a cold winters evening. For this woman, I guess it was like losing a relative. Of course, I could be totally wrong with all of this, as I say I only saw what I saw for a matter of seconds as I drove past. Hopefully I am wrong and all is well.

Happy Talk Like a Pirate Day for yesterday too :)

The NSPCBR called to say i'm neglecting you.

2009-09-16T18:51:00.004+01:00

The NSPCBR being...National Society for the Protection against Cruelty of Blog Readers, and no they don't exist. Sorry, it's been like 12 days since I last updated, which in all honesty isn't that long, but even so thought I should update. Times are changing swiftly, work things are changing, I think the next few months could be very interesting, don't want to say too much in case of jinxing things, but i'm looking forward to it. Was at the Pavilion Theatre in Rhyll recently, where the above photo was taken. This amused me and got posted on twit pic, sat on the prompt desk in a box behind a glass panel which read "In case of showbiz emergency, break glass". I imagine this little friend comes out when the Chuckle Brothers and Britains Got Talent arrive, neither of which in the same show of course.

If you're on twitter then follow me, it's www.twitter.com/astreather, and if you're not, then why not? There's something about twitter, when I first joined I thought it was a load of crap and a waste of time, so shoved it to one side for nearly a year. But then it came big again and I thought i'd give it a go, and now i'm hooked, almost as though it's some kind of drug that i'm not addicted to. Love it!

Derren Brown deserves a mention for predicting the lottery. All these people coming up with stupid guesses of how he did it are seriously making me laugh, it's all over the papers and the internet. I personally don't think he did it the way he said he did, through the whole "Wisdom of the Crowds" solution. The technical person in me, having worked on a number of Brown's shows, says that all this split screen stuff is bollocks and he wouldn't have done it. A little part of me just thinks that maybe, just maybe, he might have fixed the machine and put heavier balls in place of the others. As with alot of things, I guess we'll never know, and maybe that's what makes it so great. It's got people talking anyway! This week he controls the nation, i'm away so I really hope this thing works on 4OD when I get back or I will be gutted.

Feeling pretty rotten at the moment, come down with a spout of the man flu, think i'm at the tail end of it which is good news. Haven't told many people because someone is bound to go off on one and decide that i've got Swine Flu and I shouldn't be working etc. etc. Complete media hyped bollocks as usual, which the beeb are still going on about, tonight it's their Panorama special about Swine Flu. Seriously???? I'll be watching the footie with a cold magners and chocolate covered raisins.

I'll leave you on this final note: "Don’t do anything you are not prepared to explain to a paramedic."

The Lakes, Walking Sticks, and the London Astoria

2009-09-03T15:51:00.007+01:00

It's taken me ages to get round to doing this blog post, I haven't actually been particularly busy, I just haven't found the time to do it. I guess lazyness comes into it somewhere, but in my defence, I have just spent a week climbing mountains (evidence above to all those non believers!).

It was a good week, the weather did deteriorate, and it started to piss it down on about 3 of the days meaning I couldn't do everything that I wanted to do but achieved the most important thing on the first day, and that was Helvellyn and Striding Edge. If you're into this sort of thing and ever get the chance, you have to do Helvellyn via Striding Edge, it's a excellent thrill which does involve a certain amount of rock climbing and scrambelling towards the end of the ridge but once you get to the top you realise why you've just worked so hard to reach it, and thats evident in the photo below.

I speak alot about this climb because it was very memorable and something that I feel was a great achievement, but we did other walks during the week when it wasn't raining. I'm quite glad the rain is coming, summer gets tedious and hot by the end, there gets a stage for me when wind and rain is a welcome occurance. Many people will disagree with this, but I prefer Autumn and Winter to Summer. So about what the weather is doing now, but saying that it's gonna warm up from tomorrow.

What do you do on a rainy day? Lose at pillow fighting to a little kid, mind you, there's really not much you can do while there's a 2 year old sitting on your head!! Speaking of being a kid, ever since I started walking in the Lakes I always collected walking stick mounts. I collected a stick from the woods, carved it out and made it shine, and every time I visited a place or climbed a mountain I'd gain a little badge to go on this walking stick. To this day I've still got it, and I took it to the Lakes with me. But to be disappointment it became evident that these walking stick badges are no longer sold. You can get them on ebay, but none of any of the Lake District Mountains, if anyone has any idea where I can get these from then please let me know!!! I'd be very interested to find out whats happened to these.

On a final note, I only just learnt yesterday that the London Astoria is about to be demolished. The former pickle factory was an intermitate 2000 capacity music venue, and one my favourite venues around. It's hosted everyone from the Rolling Stones to Oasis to The Beach Boys. An absolute shame to see it go, i'm gutted. RIP the London Astoria...

I am still alive, honest.

2009-08-29T21:22:00.003+01:00

It's been a busy few weeks, here's a quick fun update for you, full Lake District update coming soon!!!!

Type in the following and write the first description found.... Be honest, don't just pick one out to be funny!
1: Type in "[your first name] needs" in the Google search:
2: Type in "[your first name] looks" in Google search:
3: Type in "[your first name] hates" in Google search:
4: Type in "[your first name] goes" OR "[your first name] has gone" in Google search:
5: Type in "[your first name] loves" in Google search:
6: Type in "[your first name] eats" in Google search:
7: Type in "[your first name] has" in Google search:
8: Type in "[your first name] works" in Google search:
9: Type in"[your first name] lives" in Google searh:
10: Type in "[your first name] dies" in Google search:
11. Type in "[your first name] does" in Google search:
12: Type in "[your first name] will" in Google search:

Here goes:
1. Adam needs to Shower Petition
2. Adam looks like Heath Ledger
3. Adam Hates Megan Matthews (Sorry Megan, whoever you are?!)
4. Two ready to arrive as Adam goes
5. Adam Loves Beer
6. Adam Eats Whole Pack of Big League Chew (:S)
7. Adam has the most amazing rock voice I've ever heard
8. Adam Works on Jennifer's Body (no further comments on that one)
9. Adam lives in theory
10. Adam dies in freak accident
11. Adam does the devil!
12. Adam will win it all.

Okay - Now go to images.google.com - type your first name, save and attach the first image that comes up to your note. This image is above

This makes a bit of sense....

2009-08-19T23:23:00.002+01:00

Just took this test here: http://www.quizbox.com/personality/test82.aspx

Your view on yourself:

You are down-to-earth and people like you because you are so straightforward. You are an efficient problem solver because you will listen to both sides of an argument before making a decision that usually appeals to both parties.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:

You like serious, smart and determined people. You don't judge a book by its cover, so good-looking people aren't necessarily your style. This makes you an attractive person in many people's eyes.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:

You prefer to get to know a person very well before deciding whether you will commit to the relationship.

The seriousness of your love:

You like to flirt and behave seductively. The opposite sex finds this very attractive, and that's why you'll always have admirers hanging off your arms. But how serious are you about choosing someone to be in a relationship with?

Your views on education

Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.

The right job for you:

You have many goals and want to achieve as much as you can. The jobs you enjoy are those that let you burn off your considerable excess energy.

How do you view success:

You are confident that you will be successful in your chosen career and nothing will stop you from trying.

What are you most afraid of:

You are concerned about your image and the way others see you. This means that you try very hard to be accepted by other people. It's time for you to believe in who you are, not what you wear.

Who is your true self:

You like privacy very much because you enjoy spending time with your own thoughts. You like to disappear when you cannot find solutions to your own problems, but you would feel better if you learned to share your thoughts with a person you trust.

I won't go near Liverpool after this post.

2009-08-10T19:38:00.004+01:00

Firstly, before I start this, in no way do I mean any offence in this post and I do send my best wishes to the family of the boys involved, despite what I am about to say, it is a dreadful tragedy from which three familys in the North West are suffering at this time. Take a read of this story before reading further.

I think the photo in this story says it all. What idiot climbs on top of a freight train in a secured depot where there is live electricity wires above your head, all depots have indications of this, and common sense usually provails? Not only did he climb on top of this train, he then grabbed hold of the overhead electric cables. Seriously, what are parents and schools teaching kids these days. When I was 13/14, my brain would have told me that doing this was dangerous and I would get in big trouble for doing it. Yes there is a certain level of thrill about doing it, but I would have thought at that age that doing this would seriously injure me and it wasn't a wise idea.

Liam's teacher Emma-Jane Percy, head of Year 9 at St Benedict's Catholic College, said: "Liam was a wonderful, bright young man. Clearly not that bright if he was standing on top of a freight train having broken into its depot.

It's amusing that now the parents and local residents of Allerton are blaming the depot for not putting enough safety measures in place to keep kids out. I guess they probably think that they should install 30ft high electric fences and a no fly zone around the depot too. Mind you, someone would probably ignore all signs and risks and try to climb the electric fences. At the end of the day, these kids had broken into this depot, they were tresspassing at their own risk, they then climbed on top of a parked up freight train and grabbed the electric wires above the train. I mean what on earth do you think is going to happen? The schools and parents need to take blame for this, why were their kids allowed to get into this depot, why were they not taught of the dangers of doing so? 25,000 volts would cause a little tingle don't you think?!

From Hong Kong to Hastings

2009-08-07T21:34:00.003+01:00

Home safe, tired, going for a bath, sort of missing Hong Kong...Hastings just isn't the same. That was an easy blog for today, catch you later. Have a joke in the meantime:

Want to talk to someone about drugs?

Talk to Frank.... .... He's the black guy at number 7 with the Range Rover on the drive. That guy can get his hands on just about anything.

Hong Kong Day Seven - Last Day!!!

2009-08-05T13:21:00.009+01:00

So, that's my last full day in Hong Kong finished. Don't leave until 23:55 tomorrow, so technically have all day tomorrow but need to pack, so we're hanging round the local area tomorrow, probably wonder down to the markets, and get all my stuff ready before I fly back. Final Typhoon update for you, Severe Tropical Storm Goni actually missed Hong Kong, we got the edge of it, and it took down a few posters and boards but nothing major and it was all over night anyway. Looking out the window now, weather is worse than last night, thunder and lighting and torrential rain.

It's been fairly rainy and grey all day, perfect for a museum, plus Wednesday is free admission to numerous museums in Hong Kong. So we headed over to the Museum of History just across the water from Hong Kong Island. History has always interested me, and I think it's important to find out how this place got to where it did, and the stages it went through. Hong Kong has a very interesting history, from the Japanese Occupation during World War II to the Opimum wars and the Chinese Dynastys hundreds of years ago, the museum has some great live size displays that covers everything. It even adds in bits of China's history so you get to read up on that. If you're around, and get the chance, check it out, but make sure to see it in order. You can easily skip stages, but it's important to get all the story. It's like being in chapter 11 of a book and going straight to chapter 19, you miss out on chapter 12 - 18. And it's not like Eastenders, you can't catch up after having not watched it for months.

Today has, however, been fulled with slow walking chinese people who I did find quite rude in the museum. They seemed to like standing in front of you while you're either trying to read something or take a photos. It is known that there can be a certain amount of rudeness in Hong Kong, but this is understandably down to the speed of life they lead. And plus people who walk slowly standing in a line blocking the pavement do my nut, even in England. Even so, i've found them quite pleasant this week, at times a bit rude, but mostly quite pleasant and they can't half cook some good grub!

Quite interesting that the above photo is of Hong Kong island, only about 90 years ago, pre-world war I, amazing how much it has changed. Also amazing how much land has been reclaimed in the past 100 years, and they're still reclaiming it now. Just started building new on Hong Kong Island. Had a lovely home cooked curry tonight, and just watching Slumdog Millionairre.

It's been a fantastic trip, as I've said before it's another box ticked off my "Thing's to do before I die" list, thoroughly loved every bit of this trip visiting this amazing city, there's no single item I can pick out as being my favourite, just everything has been great. If you ever get the chance, I highly recommend you visit this city, it is unique in so many different ways, every corner you turn is something different, and usually something you don't see in every city. Back to England tomorrow, back to normality. But only for a short period, then it's off with the family for a week in the Lake District. I guess life isn't all that bad!

Hong Kong - Day Six

2009-08-04T14:02:00.008+01:00

Evening! That's day six over with, typhoon update for you first. Despite it going off track and the fact that Hong Kong will not be taking a direct hit, the Hong Kong version of the met office are due to issue a T8 warning in the next half an hour, T10 is hurricane force winds! However its going to pass overnight so i'll probably sleep through it, all very exciting! Mind you, if they're anything like the met office, then it'll probably be a light wind with the occasional shower, and even then they'll get the day wrong.
Went and rode on the largest series of Outdoor Escalators in the world today. Another excellent idea from the Hong Kong transport industry. From 6am to 10am they go downhill, and from 10am onwards they go up hill. So that people going home from work can get there easily. It takes you up, past around 10-15 streets, up to Mid Levels. An excellent invention! The above photo amused me, this was in a lift in the Bank of China building where we went to take a look out on Hong Kong from their Observatory deck. Take your choice of floors....43 or 1?

It was nice to see the above cenotaph memorial for the people who died in the two World Wars in Central Hong Kong Island. This was obviously placed during the British Colonial times, and has never been moved. When you think about the value of this land, it's truly brilliant to see its still there. Speaking of British Colonial times, we took a walk from the Mid Levels Escalators to Hong Kong Park today, this took us past all the British built buildings, and it was quite fascinating to see the strong British resemblance still in Hong Kong.

Hong Kong Park was truly special. It's beautiful in it's own little weird way, set smack bang in the middle of Central Hong Kong, it really is a chance to get out of the hustle and bustle of Hong Kong's financial district into a peaceful green retreat. There's alot of these in Hong Kong, and in a way it's what makes Hong Kong so different to all other cities.

Finally went along to Temple Street Night Market. It's one of these world famous places that i've heard so much about and really wanted to go and see. It's one of these places where you really can spend hundreds of pounds on absolute junk. Bought a fair few things there, most quite useful, these include: x4 Fake DVDs, all of fairly decent quality ( Angels and Demons, Harry Potter & The Half Blood Prince, Slumdog Millionairre and Valkyrie), all cost me around about £8! Also bought a new multitool, new torch, 2 new pairs of sunglasses, and numerous gifts for family.

Had a really good day, was alot cooler today which was lovely, and had a nice breeze. Off to do the historical bit tomorrow, as it does quite interest me, so off to visit the Hong Kong Museum of History, as long as the winds aren't too strong. 48 hours till I come home, had a great time in Hong Kong, another box ticked for one of those things to do before you die!

Hong Kong - Day Five - Typhoon Warning!!!!

2009-08-03T10:06:00.012+01:00

Bring in your children the typhoon is coming!!! As of 15:15 today, the Hong Kong Observatory issued a stage one warning for a typhoon, on path to give a direct hit to Hong Kong on Wednesday. Rain and storms have already arrived! T1 is the current warning, T10 is full blown Hurricane. Watch this space, quite fancied a typhoon and looks like I might be getting my wish. On another note, some hacker with nothing better to do with their time has spammed by Twitter and now it's been suspended. Still waiting for Twitter to reply to my support request, all very frustrating. These people really need to get out more.

Luckily we've managed to get our day done with before the T1 was issued and the rain & storms appeared. Views over HK are not so good at the moment. It's been a very different day today, instead of heading into the hustle & bustle of the Hong Kong metropolis, it's been out in a different direction to the countryside and lovely scenic views of Ngong Ping.

By far the best way to get there is the 25minute ride on the Ngong Ping 360 Cable Car. Some absolutly fantastic sights from these cars, most of which i can't upload to here but will be uploading to facebook. The whole reason for heading up there was to see the impressive Tian Tan Buddha. This is the largest outdoor seated Buddha in the entire world. At 110 feet tall, it can be seen from miles away and is a brilliant sight. 200 odd steps to the top but some great photo ops when you're there. It was really nice today to see a different part of Hong Kong, and to be able to get out into the country side. It never ceases to fascinate me just how green this city is.

I have to give a mention to the excellent Octopus System in place around Hong Kong. It's main use is very similar to the Oyster Card on board London Transport Systems, but the Octopus card can also be used in shops and other stores to pay for items. It's an excellent system and very well though through, does make like easier, especially for residents. You can even get your change from purchases put onto this card.

As you can see it's along way home! I have to say that it is kind of weird being one of the taller people on the underground, usually i'm one of the shortest. Anyway, i'm off to research typhoon shelters and track its path, it's all very exciting, never been in a typhoon before. I bet after all this it won't happen. Still planning the next few days, tomorrow we're off to visit Hong Kong Park, the Hong Kong Museum of History and then the world famous Temple Street Night Market! Ciao for now!

Hong Kong - Day Four

2009-08-02T15:06:00.009+01:00

Let me paint you a picture, imagine sitting in a Sauna for 3 1/2 hours, full clothed, watching a football game, this is how we felt this afternoon. I'm actually surprised i was still sweating, don't think I had any more sweat to sweat out. Saying that, a shower was thoroughly enjoyed when we got home after the game. Fair to say it was one of the hottest days of the year yet, especially with the humidity, maybe not great weather to watch football. I can't even imagine to think what it must have been like to play in it, Tottenham Hotspur players did seem to be struggling, the scoreline shows that.

Final score today - South East China 2 Tottenham Hotspurs 0. I don't think it was so much South East China were brilliant, more of the fact that Spurs were shockingly bad, even when they brought on Keane, Defoe and Lennon. I do get the feeling that they felt the heat, as did most of the crowd. Even so it was a very good game, and a well deserved win by the Chinese. Their first goal was a cracking volley, one of the best goals i've seen in a while. Also nice was the fact that even though we were 5000 miles away, every member of the crowd and teams stood in a one minutes silence to remember the great late Sir Bobby Robson (see above pic).

One thing that has fascinated me recently is the Chinese Scaffolding. There's no metal poles or clambs, it's all entirely made out of Bamboo (see above pic). And there's all these little blokes climbing all over it. How it stays up is amazing. Just shows what you can do with natural products. I don't think the reaction would be great if this practice was used back in Health & Safety gone Politically Correctness mad Britain!

Forgot to mention last night the crazy Pakistanis who pester you constantly in Nathan Road asking if you want to buy watches or have a suit made. Even when you say no they still don't get the point. Figured out though that if you give them a firm no, and then they keep on, just ignore them and they swiftly get the message. I'm not one for being rude to people, but sometimes ignorance is the best idea.

Anyway, hopefully tomorrow won't be as warm. Heading further outside of Hong Kong for a change tomorrow, off to see Tian Tan Buddha which is the largest outdoor Buddha in the world. Got to get on Ngong Ping cable car to get there, which takes about 25 mins, but apparently some cracking views from it. Then a traditional chinese meal tomorrow night. Bedtime now for me, night!

Hong Kong - Day Three

2009-08-01T14:43:00.010+01:00

As you stand on Victoria Peak, from one side you see a busy metropolis of high rise skyscrapers to turning around and looking over to the other side where it is a green national park type region with beaches and the occasional apartment block. No city in the world is like this one.

It was warm today, around about 33oC with the sun high in the sky which made it slightly toasty, especially when walking along the promenade on Hong Kong Harbour or up on the peak. The peak is the place to go in Hong Kong for without a doubt the best panoramic views, of not only Hong Kong city, but the rest of the island and also the rest of the new territories. On a clear day it's an amazing sight, and this is what we got today. It was absolutly beautiful, slight treck in the heat up to the Peak tram which takes you up to the summit. The Peak Tram has been in operation since 1888, it takes you up 800 metres over Hong Kong island at times with at degrees of 27. Got an excellent video of us coming back down it which i'll upload to youtube in time.

I'm doing this blog a bit back to front, but I guess it doesn't matter. As we emerged from the Hong Kong underground system beside the Space Museum you get a sense of just why it's one of the most famous and recognised views in the entire world. Streching for what must be a few miles, no number of photos can really put into words just how amazing it is, it really is a case of, you must come and see it to understand just how immense the view is. It's almost more breathtaking than the view from the Peak, but in different ways.

Before I got here, I imagined Hong Kong to be like any normal city e.g. London, New York etc. but it isn't at all. Even if you don't love cities, you can spend a day in the city, but spend another 6 days out in the wilderness treking up mountains. It's like an english summer around November and December time, so quite pleasant. I've got tons of photos, and will be uploading the best ones to Facebook when i get back to the UK and have the time. Up until then its just the tasters on here.

We finished the day with a nice meal in the famous Nathan Road, you may not have heard of it but you'd recognise it in the photos. This was followed by us returning once again to the waterfront for what is officially the biggest permenant Sound and Lighting Show in the world. 44 buildings participate in this dazzling display of the areas culture and technology. Containing 16,594 dynamic light fixtures, the nightly show is programmed and co-ordinated through the internet using a custom built show control system installed in all the buildings (can I have their internet speed please?) A truly amazing show, especially for someone as geeky about the whole this as I am. And very busy on the waterfront too.

Tomorrow is a bit of a quieter and easy day, it's off to support Tottenham Hotspurs....I never thought i'd see the day. Well it's either them or South China, and I should support the english team! More photos and blogs to come, along with hopefully some more vlogs! Watch this Space!

New Vlog: Sunrise in Hong Kong

2009-08-01T00:36:00.001+01:00

Morning all, just added my first ever vlog to youtube, a good one to start on...sunrise in Hong Kong. Check it out below:

Hong Kong - Day Two

2009-07-31T10:47:00.008+01:00

**Having some issues with uploading photos at the moment, will fix this tomorrow for the next blog**As with most things, no matter what quality or size of the photograph, it will never show you just how amazing this place is. I still can't believe how 10 mins from the centre of Hong Kong, you can be sitting in the middle of a forest in pretty much silence. I'm beginning to see why this city is so popular with tourists, and am yet to set foot on Hong Kong island. Two photos above, the first one is Hong Kong by night, you can just about make out the lights of Hong Kong island in the distance. Second one is the view from my bedroom window in the apartment. Woke up at 4 this morning, went back to sleep and then got up at 10am. My body clock is a bit all over the place but that's jet lag for you. Hopefully when I go to bed at 11pm Hong Kong time tonight it'll sort itself out. Today has been a nice day of relaxing and seeing the local area. Have been looking at Hong Kong island all day but haven't quite made it there, that's what tomorrow's all about. After a late start, food shopping was needed, nothing special really to talk about there...the best bits about shopping in this sort of country is the markets. Everything is available on the markets, even cats and turtles! Though i'm not sure these are to be eaten... It was meant to be a traditional chinese lunch tonight, instead we ended up in a Japanese restaurant...minus the Sushi. Was very enjoyable, looking forward to a proper Chinese dinner when we get round to it. Cost was only £14 for the 3 of us. Heading to the tourist area tomorrow so that'll be a bit more pricey. This was followed by a short walk down to the the sea, took the above photo of my dad looking out of the South China sea there. Headed up to Nina tower which is the 33rd biggest building in the world, originally it was planned for the tower to be made the biggest building in the world but due to its close proximity to Hong Kong airport at the time, they were restricted to its height. This towers, as does most of Hong Kong, among tons of greenery and hills. My Dad described it very well, it's like something out of "Sim City", it very much is like one of those cities you build with everything in it.

Once we'd headed back to the apartment, got a drink and cooled down it was decided to head over to a viewing point which looks over Lantau Island in the direction of Hong Kong International Airport. Lovely weather to jump on a motorbike for a quick drive through both city and countryside to check out the views out to see and over the surrounding islands. Some excellent photos from there, but can only really upload one without me being here all night, so tried to add the best one.

Just chilling out tonight, watching the footy. South Asia cup final tonight...Tottenham Hotspur vs. Hull City, very eastern I know! Tomorrow is gonna be a good day, going to take the short tube ride to Kowloon, take some photos of Hong Kong island, and then head over for the first time and explore. Keep Posted!!

Hong Kong - Day One

2009-07-30T15:30:00.005+01:00

**Photo not taken by me, i've only been here 6 hours!**

I guess this is day one, we'll class it as that for the purpose of this post. It's currently 22:30 here on the South Eastern Coast of China, it's quite strange because i've pretty much lost a day. I left Heathrow at 22:30 last night and got to Hong Kong at 17:25. Slept very well on the plane, which is a huge change, I can usually never sleep but this time I managed about 4 or 5 hours so for me its about 3:30pm and i'm not really tired. Even so going to try to head to bed soon or i'll just make the jet lag worse. Landing at HK airport is a bit scary, because it's on an island all you see until about 5 secs before landing is water getting closer and closer!

The good news is that the view from my Dad's apartment is pretty good, 62 floors down...well minus the number "4's" because apparently in China the number 4 means "Death" or something similar, so you don't get a floor with a 4 in it. Floor 40 to 49 is non existant...you figure it out"! As I say great views, can just see Hong Kong island in the distance and saw bits of the lights show tonight, see the full thing on saturday.

Managed to get tickets to South China vs. Spurs at the Hong Kong stadium on Sunday so that'll be quite good. Very weird driving into Hong Kong from the airport because its nothing like what you imagine, all very hilly and green, until you reach the city. It's like a metropolis jungle, surrounded by a totally green jungle. Probably one of the most unique cities in the world from what i've seen so far.

Tomorrow's a quiet day, see the more local area before it's off to Hong Kong Island on Saturday, lots more photo ops there!

I'm Swine Ridden

2009-07-23T00:00:00.003+01:00

...well at least my house it anyway. Apologies for the lack of updates, one is coming prior to my Hong Kong trip, I may even post a brief itinerary for anyone in Hong Kong so they can stalk me. Ay just think of that all you freaks out there. My mum has had Swine Flu, she's at the tail end of it (it's a pink and curly tail) so i'm desperatly avoiding that. In between hiding from the swines and organising my holiday I came across this video. It's by the Amateur Transplants, who i've always been a fan of, I think some of the stuff they do is absolutly hilarious, and I thought the same about this video. It's definitly only for over 18s and if you're easily offended then i'd recommend you avoid it. Enjoy!!

Good Ruler, Bad Person

2009-07-08T16:45:00.003+01:00

Bernie Ecclestone has today been forced to apologise after his comments about Ex German Dictator Adolf Hitler, Ecclestone commented that "the leader had a great ability to get things done". He was subsequently rapped, Jewish Chronicle editor , Stephen Pollard described Ecclestone as "either an idiot or morally repulsive". The full Sky News story is available here.

I can see where Bernie Ecclestone has gone wrong here, I think its a simple misunderstanding. Hitler was a very evil person who persucuted thousands of jews for no crime, however despite this Adolf Hitler was a very charismatic and intelligent bloke. He managed to convince the majority of the German population to follow him and his destructive policies. In the 1930's Germany was in a similar state to what the world is today, it faced a deep economic crisis and it's industrys were in turmoil. Hitler came in and rebuilt the economy and did alot for Germany. But he did alot wrong. Hitler had a strong personality, a personality and the strengths that could have been put into doing so good, unfortunatly through his own doings he used it for evil, an evil which will never be forgotton.

I think Hitler was a ruler, not a leader. He ruled his people well by bringing them to power, but he did not lead them to be decent humans. Nor did he bring himself to be a decent human being. Despite what history says, you have to admit to what a great ruler he was, and the huge amount of charisma and political talent he possessed.

Politically Correct Controversy

2009-07-07T23:30:00.004+01:00

Numerous people have commented recently on my controversial facebook, twitter and blog comments. I'm sure people by now do realise that I say what i think, and I don't hold back, and unfortunatly it's one of my strengths but also one my weaknesses. If I don't like you, then why should I spend days kissing your arse and acting like we're great mates, instead if I get it out in the open we can move on. This is not to say that I can develop working relationships with these people, sometimes it is a nessecity and it needs work from both parts, but if I think you're talking out of your arse than i'll damn right tell you. There are alot of people I don't like in this life, people who I think are complete arseholes and I have no time for, however I have a working relationship with these people and we can get along, saying that i'd never consider going out for a beer with them. This is my exact feeling on Politically Correctness, taken from urbandictionary.com:

Something that started out as a sort of moral common sense - actually not a bad idea, eg. saying 'black person' instead of 'god-damn cotton-pickin' nigger'. However, the whole thing got utterly out of hand in the early 90s to the point where a lot of people will say 'Afro-Carribean' or 'Afro-American' because they think it's racist to say 'black'! It gets even more ridiculous when you consider that in some parts people think it's offensive to 'blackboard' or 'black coffee'.

What began as a force for good (considering the number of people who really are racist, sexist and homophobic) has since become a laughing stock beacause of the ridiculous extremes to which certain neurotic ultra-liberals took it - cf. a person being 'vertically challenged' rather than short. This has actually undone a lot of progress made in changing bigoted attitudes (as bigot can claim any offence taken at their views is 'political correctness gone mad), whilst making people feel guilty for enjoying anything but the blandest, most anaemic humour for fear of being 'offensive'. I mean, seriously, what's funnier out of 'Friends' and 'South Park'? (Or 'The League of Gentlemen' for the benefit of any Brits out there?)

At the same time as straight white able-bodied men are going out of their way to talk about 'ethnic people' (who ISN'T ethnic!?) and those of 'different sexual orientation', there are blacks calling themselves niggas (which has been going on for years), gays calling themselves (and eachother!) poof, queens and queers, and so on - the real way to neutralize a term used as as an insult is for those to whom it was applied to use it themselves.

AT its worst, political correctness is nothing different form Orwell's - an attempt to change the way people think by forcibly changing the way they speak. So let's have a backlash against the nannying, interefering, cotton-wool Stalinism 'ploitical correctness' has become - not to placate bigots, but to speak the truth and enjoy outrageous humour like we're meant to. Remember, the next time someone says they don't like Harry Potter because Hermione is a stereotypically sensitive girl, the relevant word to call them is 'cunt'.

And yes, that is exactly how I feel about politically correctness. There's too much other shit happening in this world and in other peoples lives, for our government and the current nanny state to tell us what we can or can't say. If I want to say Michael Jackson is a kiddy fiddling Gary Glitter wannabe then I will (I don't agree with all this statement), if I want to call a vertically challenged person a bloody dwarf then I will. This is everything that is wrong with this world, so much of the "oh you can't say this cause you'll upset this person", or "you can't say that cause that person will get annoyed"...well fuck them.

On the Jackson topic, I know alot of people have been annoyed with some of my comments about the late great Michael Jackson. Allow me to make it clear how I feel about Michael Jackson: "I'm utterly bored of all the news being full of it now. Yes he changed the music industry, yes he was a phenomenally talented bloke who could dance and sing like noone ever known. But in my opinion he was a very ill man, who fiddled kids. And yes I have compared him to Gary Glitter because there are similaritys. His Child Abuse charges were never help up, but who pays out $22million in an out of court settlement if you're entirely innocent." That's where I will leave it, as I think its time Michael Jackson was left to Rest In Peace. Let's change the record, some new news please, how is Hazel Blears's husband's porn collection lately anyway?

I'll never change, i'll always be the person I am, and I quite like me, I have a sick sense of humour, but its time this world lightened up and I know that people smile when they see my facebook and twitter updates. In this current climate, making one person smile a day can't harm. Let's all lighten up and tell the nanny state exactly where they can shove their politically correctness.

Midge Ure playing "Vienna" Live at HBMF 2009

2009-07-06T20:01:00.004+01:00

Check out this great video of Ultravox Bassist and Live Aid co-producer Midge Ure at this years Hastings Beer and Music Festival. The crowd just loved it when he kicked off with this song. A true legend.

If you get the chance, check out some of the other videos that the creator of this has done. Andy has some great vlogs on his page, some very interesting topics. So check that out while you're on there.

How much for a pair of sunglasses???

2009-07-06T19:50:00.003+01:00

You know how festivals are, you're always going to lose something, this year I lost my sunglasses. I don't even remember them falling off my head, which is quite surprising cause they were quite well fitted and i don't have much hair to hide the feeling.

So anyway I decided to go into town to get a new pair. Walked into Boots, how much???? £25 were the cheapest pair...for a pair of sunglasses?! Went to a few other shops and found them no cheaper. I couldn't believe how expensive sunglasses were. I remember a colleague of mine buying a pair when we were in Scotland, these were a designer pair and cost him about £160, and I was actually shocked. I don't think I could ever bring myself to buying a pair of sunglasses for that price. I just want a cheap £10 which will do the job and look reasonably good. As always Ebay saved the day and I got a nice reflective pair for £7.99 which will be arriving in the next few days. I mean, why spend stupid amounts when you can get a fairly decent pair cheaply. I did notice that there were numerous ones on ebay going for about over a grand....seriously, who buys these?

On another note, finished another Hastings Beer and Music Festival, this year was my 4th year mainly because of my love of the event. I think its a great festival and an event that Hastings would miss if it weren't there. As always some great acts, and we got some hilarious texts on the big screen on Saturday Night, some of which I may post here in a later blog for pure amusement purposes. We also had Ultravox Bassist and Live Aid producer Midge Ure there on the Friday Night, this was a cracking night and i'll post the video in a second. If you couldn't be there then you missed an amazing event, make sure you come to the 2010 event...which I'm already looking forward to.

Alcoholic Monkeys

2009-06-26T17:05:00.004+01:00

If you, like me, are bored of everyone talking about Michael Jackson, and bored of Heart playing Michael Jackson songs every 15 minutes then here's a video to lighten the mood. Remember seeing this on TV, hilarious stuff.

National Fall Awareness Day

2009-06-23T23:03:00.003+01:00

This is not another one of those "we have too many days" blogs, even though we do have a day for every stupid little thing. This is a blog once again to raise the awareness of politically correctness gone a bit wrong and continuing to spend public money on common sense issues.

The following story appeared on the Hastings Observer website today:

Pensioners to get advice to prevent bus falls

Pensioners in Hastings are to be given expert advice this week to cut the number of falls on buses.

As part of National Falls Awareness Day (Tuesday June 23) local people are being invited to head down to either outside Debenhams in the town centre or Sainsbury's supermarket in St Leonards.

Now correct me if i'm wrong, yes there is an issue of elderly and frail people falling over on buses and seriously injure themselves, and i'm not saying lets play down the issue and not support these people. But is it really nessacary to hold such an event, payed for out of the NHS budget which is public money for something which you could basically put an advertisement on the bus saying "Press the bell but Don't stand up until the bus stops"...simple as that job done. What need is there for there to be a special day for it, and then spend what is probably hundreds pounds on getting experts down, paying these experts to tell everyone something that should be common sense and could be done with cheaper and easier ways.

Especially when today it was revealed that after the success of the Hands of the Conquest Maternity campaign, we now risk losing our A&E Department. How about putting the money into that. This government and country have gone politically correctness mad, and they're spending money on the little issues rather than trying to sort out the bigger picture.

Last Teenage Years

2009-06-22T16:05:00.002+01:00

Thanks to all for their birthday wishes today, where did the last year go? Yes at 11:59am 19 years ago today, the world changed...things were never the same again. So much has happened, and now i'm into the last year of my teenage life, the future is ahead of me, and i'm gonna live it to the full!

I have to say I am highly amused at the amount of people who have falled for the whole "Michael Schumacher is the stig" stunt by the BBC's Top Gear. He isn't, it's just the beeb trying to put an end to the speculation, in fact I think the stig should always be a secret. It's one of those great things in life.

Anyway, a longer update is due soon, in the meantime i'm off to enjoy the rest of my birthday with a curry.

Whatever doesn't kill you, makes your stronger.

2009-06-17T00:21:00.004+01:00

...so they say, but I think I should be entering the world strongest man competition. The above photo has absolutly nothing to do with this blog, I just found it amusing and thought i'd share it. Like sharing the love, but with photos.

Firstly, a great shock it was on Sunday to find out that local musician Dave Blackman had died. A well liked bloke who i'd have the opportunity to not only work with on numerous occasions but also to see live, a great stage presence and a pleasure to work with. At least he died doing what he loved. He will surely be missed by a large number of people, especially among the local music scene. RIP Dave.

It's very nice being back at Hospital Radio and entertaining the ill again. Something I have missed, not sure the listeners have, but I know I have. So if you're ever in the Conquest on a Sunday, have a listen, it might make you feel better....or worse, but we hope better.

It's 00:35 and i'm off to Edinburgh tomorrow, guess I should consider starting to pack, stupid me didn't put my washing in until 9pm, now i've got to wait for it to go through the Tumble Dryer too. Doh! Yes, Edinburgh Playhouse...back to the lovely Live Nation which is always a pleasure, no seriously it is...most of their venues are well looked after with excellent backstage facilities. Then off to New Brighton, which I frankly never even knew existed and even google maps had issues finding it, so that'll be an experience. And then into the lovely Derbyshire hills to the quaint town of Buxton. I think it will be a nice time away, and then return for my 19th on Monday. Yes I know, 19 years on this planet, one more year of my teens....

Gordon's Secret Identity

2009-06-11T18:33:00.005+01:00

Gordon's been busy lately, no not seeing what other messes he can get this country into, but in fact commenting on Cristiano Ronaldo's £80m transfer to Real Madrid;

PRIME MINISTER GORDON BROWN

"He's one of the most brilliant players in the world. I think people will be sad that he's lost to the game in England.

"At the same time, I know Sir Alex Ferguson well, and I know he'll have plans that will be rebuilding and renewing his team. And I would expect that Manchester United and English football will emerge not weaker, but emerge in a new way and probably stronger in the long run".

Ah, it is great to know that despite the recession, Westminster being thrown into crisis, ructions in the Labour Party and a broken Britain, our Prime Minister is busy dealing with trivial football transfers. Do you think that maybe Gordon Brown wishes he could be Sir Alex Ferguson and be the boss of Manchester United, or maybe Sir Alex can just handle money better?

In other news, I've had a great week, went to the gym the other day and had a damn good workout which was followed by a swim and a chill out in the Jacuzzi. I was unbelievably relaxed, sort of made me feel better for the amount I pay Duncan Bannatyne each month to use his facilities. It's always nice to have a few days off when you've been working for so long, you enjoy them more. Lots to look forward to, the next year could be very interesting...who knows what I'll be doing this time next year, I guess that is the beauty of life. Talk about beauty, I'm in Plymouth tomorrow at the Pavilions, a very nice part of the country that I've never had the privilege of visiting so I am very much looking forward to it. That is then followed by Crawley, which isn't quite the same, been there before.

You only live once

2009-06-10T00:31:00.002+01:00

Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines, sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover. - Mark Twain

Time to see the country...

2009-06-08T16:02:00.003+01:00

I'm thinking about next year, and I plan to do a quick tour of the UK, set off in the car with my camping stuff with a basic itinerary. I just need suggestions now of places to go...Probably going to have about 10 days, maybe more. Be nice to see scenery and maybe smaller towns, don't really want to go into the whole inner city hustle and bustle. Just a relaxing driving and camping holiday seeing some of the UK's best bits. Suggestions wanted for places to visit.....

There really is a group for everything...

2009-06-02T21:16:00.004+01:00

There seems to be a trend of "police" related topics on here at the moment. I've just come across this group on facebook of "who hates Hastings Police?", it comes under the "Politics" category but really should be in the "Utter Pointless" category.

Now, i'm not one for being the happiest of people with Sussex police lately but I still think they do an excellent job in Hastings, and Sussex. Not one person in this group has come up with a valid reason for hating sussex police, unfortunatly them locking your mate up for 4 years doesn't count. Here's a list of a few comments:

Anthony Tindall wrote
at 11:50 yesterday

hastings police hahaha u fuckin dickeds!! Beter luck next time !?! [||(",)||]

Ashleigh Carpenter wrote
at 23:42 on 29 May 2009

Hastings police r muggy c**ts haha

Chris Marsh wrote
at 00:16 on 27 May 2009

yes people good stuff keep it going

I happen to notice the excellent spelling and grammer of the first two comments. Anthony seems to be basically admitting to breaking the law, hopefully it will be better luck next time. Ashleigh seems to think Hastings Police are humid vaginas...whatever that is? I just thought i'd point out also that the creator of the group interests are: women, women with sexy boobs, laughing at people falling down stairs and get the polish out of england.

This country allows people their freedom of speech, and I for one think thats brilliant, but for heaven sake if you're going to have an argument, have a reason to back it up. Oh and the group also points out that Hastings Police are "skanky swine flu spreading scum bags", how that works out I have no idea. Unfortunatly another sign of a lack of respect for a person in authority in todays society.

Signs of the Times

2009-06-01T20:56:00.002+01:00

Just been reading the news online and came across this story. Unfortunately, I have been on the end of such an incident so I don't think this is isolated to just Northamptonshire.

During the 12 months between April 2008 and last month, 11.7 per cent of all crimes reported - more than 7,000 in total - were judged not to be worth investigating and did not require police attendance

Surely the word "crime" would indicate that it is worth investigating. These "crimes" included burglary, robbery and drugs offences. I think this probably comes down to the large amount of Bureaucracy and paper work. More police officers back on the beat fighting crime, not more PCSOs, Yes they offer a visible presence and reassurance to the public but unfortunately anti social youths and other criminals know that they have no powers. We need the old fashioned community bobby on the streets fighting crime, that officer of the law that every kid in the area used to be scared of. But this cannot be done without targeting the routes of these issues.

Once again, let me encourage you to vote in the June 4th elections, the time has come for every citizen in this country to make a strong point to Gordon Brown and this Labour government that we've had enough, and it's time they let the public choose their government. Allow us to go out and bring new life into British Politics, which frankly at the moment is in the gutter because of this government. It's time the public had their say, and make your vote count on June 4th. Vote for Change, Vote Conservative.

Black Horse Bonanza

2009-05-26T20:44:00.002+01:00

Currently sitting here, wearing my t-shirt, recovering from a great weekend out at Telham for this year's Black Horse Festival. Another great weekend, a truly great tribute to John Shotton, who is no longer with us but spent so much time on the festival. However, in his absence what a truly great job the current organisers did, with such a great turn out and a fantastic atmosphere every night on the trot.

There were so many bands, but among the best have to be Aynsley Lister, Achanak, Uiscedwr and of course Blair Mackichan and his band...who as always get the crowd pumping.

Another great festival, bring on 2010!

Something to pass the time...

2009-05-18T00:30:00.002+01:00

Playing For Change | Song Around The World "Stand By Me" from Concord Music Group on Vimeo.

Just a little something to pass the time. Will update soon, very very busy at the moment, life has suddenly got hectic...and not totally in a good way. Will post when I can.

Ad x

Vote for Change on June 4th

2009-05-13T23:34:00.002+01:00

For about a year now I have been a member of the young conservatives and I make no bones about hiding this. I am a strong believer the Britain needs change, that Britain needs a leader with charisma, a leader who is honest and listens to the people that matter. A leader that is chosen by the people of Britain, not one that was put there by default.

Rather than wasting money on ID cards and making cuts to the NHS, let's improve the NHS, let's support the local shops, let's keep post offices open, let's get Britain working, let's vote Conservative, and start to clean up this mess that Labour have got us into.

Every child born now inherits its mother's nose, it's father's eyes, but it also inherits Gordon Brown's debt. And that is why on Thursday June 4th, I will be voting for change in the European Parliamentary and Local Government Elections.

My Mummy told me not to talk to strangers.

2009-05-02T23:23:00.005+01:00

I've discovered a new internet sensation and been having lots of laughs over it all of tonight. Well I say, i've discovered it, I do partly have Butler to thank for it. It's a new website called Omegle.com, and basically you talk to strangers...there's no registering nothing, you just type in the web address, and you can instantly talk to some random person who has no idea who you are, and you don't know who they are. Some of the conversations you have are quite amusing.

I thought i'd post some of them on here for your amusement;

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Connecting to server...

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

You: We need to talk!

Stranger: why?

Stranger: k you bore me goodbye.

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

And before i'd even had the chance to say anything more!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

If you're easily offended, don't read this one!

Connecting to server...

Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

You: Do you like big butts? And can you not lie?

Stranger: dont be such a nigger

You: I'm no nigger

Stranger: u r a fat sack of niggershit

You: oh like your mum?

Stranger: yeah

Stranger: like ur mum

You: Correct Answer my friend!

Stranger: i 69ed her last night

You: oh i am sorry

You: that bad?

Stranger: it was a nightmare

You: That's funny, i was wondering where you were. Your dad wasn't half screaming for you last night, at least I think that's why he was screaming....might have been out of pleasure

Stranger: were you fingering his butthole?

Stranger: he likes that

You: Yeah, he said he did

You: He said "do it to me like my son does it to me"

Stranger: so you crapped on his chest

Stranger: right?

You: No no, he shat on my chest

Stranger: nice

You: Not really, your mum licked it off though

Stranger: alright

Stranger: im bored of this

You: thought you were

Stranger: peace

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Hey, he started it!

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Connecting to server...

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

Stranger: Hei! Eg gidd ikkje prate med deg akkurat no viss du ikkje er skandinavar. Ikkje ta det ille opp ;)

You: Yes me too!

Stranger: Flott =D

You: Really?

Stranger: Ja.. kvar kjem du frå?

You: I would love to, when do you want to do it?

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Connecting to server...

Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

Stranger: brasil?

You: No thanks, I like them hairy

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

I just couldn't resist that one!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Connecting to server...

Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

Stranger: i

You: Hi are you james?

Stranger: love

Stranger: you

Stranger: ya

Stranger: i am

You: Oh hey James, I'm John, been looking for you on here

Stranger: really? lol

Stranger: didn't think you would be

Stranger: so how about wat happened last night dude?

Stranger: watcha think of that?

You: Lets not talk about it....

Stranger: no no no

You: I told you she was "that" sort of girl

Stranger: dude Paul and Chris were flipping out! lol

Stranger: dude its ok i didn't tell them anything though

You: Ok that's fine then, its best to keep it a secret. We don't want your dad finding out

Stranger: lol hey hey i think its best your dad doesn't find out dude

You: My dads dead...of course he won't find out

Stranger: i know that i mean Tom your step dad

Stranger: he will beat the shit out of you man

You: He'll never find out

Stranger: lol dude you know how many ppl were there last night....someone is bound to tell

You: They were all too drunk they wont remember

Stranger: lol dude i remembered and i woke up with a guy

You: Yeah but you'd only had like 3 pints

Stranger: ya times that by 5 lol

You: oh....then we might have a problem

You: As long as noone goes to the police

Stranger: ya...might lol well i know Kristy and Jen were with me....Nicholas was there but he passed out....we were there and your little love machine...we were the only ones to see it

You: so Nicholas wasn't awake for it?

Stranger: i dont think so...

Stranger: highly doubt it

You: Shit what have i gone and done?

Stranger: hey its not like we made the situation any better by egging you on the whole time

You: Well no because I was clearly pissed out of my face

You: And my god, how did Kristy's parents get involved in it all. It's all coming back to me now

Stranger: well you had a reason to man.....If my gf caught me banging a guy i would do the same exact thing

You: I hate to say you have a point

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Connecting to server...

Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

Stranger: BABOUIN

Stranger: JE SUIS UN BABOUIN

You: Je suis Adam!

You: Je come from England

Stranger: OUBABABABBA

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

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Stranger: are u afraid of swine influence? D:

You: Not really, i'm more likely to get run over by a bus tomorrow than I am to get some pig flu.

Stranger: influenza

Stranger: what? i didnt understand... are you going to get run over by a bus?

You: I hope not!

Stranger: my native language isnt english

You: I was saying that it's unlikely i'll get this pig flu. I'm more likely to get run over by a bus

Stranger: i see

You: do you?

Stranger: nope. here no one has pig influenza.

Stranger: ayet

Stranger: yet

You: Just go get some oinkment, and you'll be fine.

Stranger: my dictionary didnt know what is oinkment :D

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Connecting to server...

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

Stranger: /b/

You: huh?

Stranger: i dont speak much english

You: me either

Stranger: im female 17 and i need a man to move in with

Stranger: where do you live

You: i live in england

You: why do you need a man to move in with?

Stranger: my ex beat me

You: oh im sorry

Stranger: i thought he loved me

Stranger: and right now im living in a community center

You: that is horrible.

Stranger: it didnt work

Stranger: ive tryed to kill myself

You: thats not good

Stranger: yeah but... i need a real man to live with

Stranger: one who will treat me right

You: Ok, i know just the man

Stranger: do you know where to find one?

You: Yes

Stranger: who

You: His name is Gordon Brown, he lives in London in a BIG house

Stranger: does he have a email.. i kinda dont have a phone

You: yes one moment

Stranger: ok

You: gordonbrown@number10.gov.uk

You: thats his personal email

Stranger: ok

Stranger: mine is ********@hotmail.com

Stranger: if you ever wanna talk again

You: he will let anybody into England, he will also give you lots of money taken from the good english tax payer

You: he'll probably fuck you up like he did the economony though

Stranger: ok

Stranger: what do you mean

You: he's an arsehole

You: not very nice

Stranger: oh

You: but i'm sure he'll be good for you

Stranger: are you sure

You: Yes

She could have been serious but I couldn't help it.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Seriously, if you've got a few minutes to spare, you've got to check this out, just for the hell of it! http://omegle.com

Suggestions Welcome...

2009-04-28T21:41:00.002+01:00

Just booked my flights to Hong Kong in July, off to visit my Dad, and fulfill another one of my many goals in life. Any suggestions of places to visit or things to see would be greatfully appreciated. Nothing like finding out from the people that know...

You Swine!

2009-04-27T00:16:00.004+01:00

Whats all this talk of bacon giving you the lergy then and killing these mexicans? All of a sudden 80 people die, and now we're all going to get the flu off some snorting pig and drop dead. Remember there are around 7 billion people in this world, that's 0.000001142857142857143% of the worlds population that have died from this so far. More people die of malaria every day!

It's all scare mongering, I mean 10 years ago we were all going to die of aids, then SARS came along...what did happen to that? And then Mad Cow Disease, well I swear a few women I know still have that, and then Bird Flu....need I go on? If one of Bernard Matthew's sneezing chickens didn't kill us, I don't think a slice of bacon is going to. I do however love the way that the americans have declared an emergency over the whole thing, I suppose they are one of the largest sausage and bacon consumers in the world today.

All of a sudden some south american farmer slaughters his pig, and the next day he comes down with a runny nose, aches and pains...gives it to a few people, and now we're all going to get it....yeah right. All this talk of bacon is making me hungry, I bet Jack Tweed is shitting himself.

4.5G, 1.8 Seconds, 205ft, 80mph

2009-04-15T23:05:00.003+01:00

I had the joy today of visiting Thorpe Park, and despite the usual Easter Holidays crowds it was quite enjoyable. Only managed to go on 4 rides while we were there, but all were worth the wait. Someone just said to me, why go there? why spend 3 hours standing in a queue for a 2 minute ride on what is basically a train flying around a track. My reply was simply...."Where can you go from 0-80mph in 1.8 seconds, fly up at 90 degrees and then fly down pretty much straight away from a huge height of 205ft, all at the same time of enduring 4.5G. And yes, it is Stealth that i'm refering to. As for Colossus, does anyone not trust those seat restrants, when you're upside down in the car on the corkscrew, your whole body weight totally on these harnesses, I just don't trust it...and i'm not a small bloke.

Don't get me wrong, I was shitting myself, nowhere near the force you're expecting but once you're off then it's just a case of enjoying the ride. It's an amazing feeling, strange feeling, and something that none of us are built for, but why not? You come off feeling great and wanting more, it's always worth the wait. It makes me want to go and play Rollercoaster Tycoon more. I wonder who came up with the whole "Rollercoaster" idea, and what they must have been thinking at the time. "Oh I know, let's scare the living daylights out of people by flying them around metal frames in cars doing high speeds and often pulling G Forces that the human body wasn't built for"....whoever they are and wherever they are, they've come up with something that is thrilling people all over the world on a daily basis....oh and making Merlin Entertainments a bomb!

Let's think about tomorrow...

2009-04-08T11:49:00.003+01:00

Have you ever thought what life would be like if you knew what tomorrow was going to bring. In a way there's part of me that would love to know what tomorrow had in store so that I could prepare for it, in what ever wasy was needed. But then again isn't it quite nice to have a surprise, I guess life would be rather boring if we knew what tomorrow held.

I know what i've got planned for this year, but in 6 months who actually knows where each of us will be or what we'll be doing. I know what I want to do but life rarely works out like that. I know what i'd like to be doing in 5 years, but god only knows what'll happen.

If i've learnt one thing in my short 19 years on this planet, it is that you get out of life what you put into it, and I guess it's all about the here and now. Everything happens for a reason, and even though even at times of deepest distress, I can now see why it all happened and how its improved life. Life is short, so never waste a minute unhappy, that's a minute you'll never get back. If the last 3 years are anything to go by then things can always change in a matter of days.

I wrote this while lying in bed last night, I guess watching Knowing last night made me think. Do love the way some films make you think about life.

What in the Dickens?

2009-04-06T16:16:00.002+01:00

Chatham seems to be the Slough of Medway, a bit stuck in the 80's and could do with a bit of TLC, never the less a trip to see Dickens World and Chatham Historic Dockyard was on the cards. I've never been a huge fan of boats, but I have always been fascinated by how they stay floating, the same with Planes, I can figure out how they can stay in the air. I guess thats science, something i've never been particularly good at. But I really enjoyed Chatham Dockyards.

It was fascinating to go through a Royal Navy submarine, still under the 30 year rule so you don't actually know where its been or what its been involved in. 3 months isn't a long time, but I imagine it must feel like 3 years when you're stuck in a cramped metal tube underwater, not seeing sunlight, especially because they were volunteers. It was also the moment I realised I could probably join the Navy, flying through portholes all over the place, thats not meant to sound at all gay though! And I never knew Blue Peter bought RNLI Lifeboats, you learn something everyday!

We also visted Dickens World, which is basically a converted warehouse with a few victorian looking structures, a theatre, a boat ride and a 4-d cinema. That is actually it, you can easily do it in 2 hours. The boat ride just seems as though its been shoved in there to add something extra, and give them something to advertise and a reason to charge £13 entry for. The theatre show was boring, however I did enjoy the excellent projection and set on show, it should be commended for that. But apart from that, I wouldn't recommend it....unless you really are Charles Dickens mad.

A good day out, won't post photos, these are all on Facebook, i'd definitly recommend Chatham Docks, even if you're not a great boat lover its still a brilliant family day out. Dickens however, unless you're a huge Charles Dickens fan, give it a miss.

P.S. On another note, I think all Chavs on Scooters should be shot, and run over by the own hairdryer powered two wheeler.

April Fools...

2009-04-01T21:37:00.000+01:00

Unfortunatly as far as I know Toyota are not bringing out a new Amphibicar, nor are any car manufacturer. April Fools....

I thought i'd seen it all...

2009-04-01T00:00:00.000+01:00

Toyota have announced today that they will be producing a car able to go on water. This seems to be a similar idea to what Top Gear attempted, and somewhat succeeded to do, a few series back. Toyota have claimed that the new "Toyota Odyssey", due to begin production in 2011, will be fitted with full sonar, radio communication and radar along with the usual devices you'd find in a normal car. The Amphibicar, as its now being called, will be in both km/h and knots. At the click of a button, bouyancy aids will inflate around the vehicle and a propeller will emerge from the rear, it really is as simple as that.

A Toyota spokesman told Sky News "It's something that has been in the pipeline for a number of years, and now we've made it a reality. It's exactly like driving a normal car, the only difference is you can drive into the sea with it."

What a great idea, It had to come eventually, I reckon that within a few years once these have got around it's going to give P&O a run for their money. Mind you, at a cost of £54,000, I think we might have to wait for the recession to be over.

This deserves support our support...

2009-03-31T12:21:00.005+01:00

I only ever support campaigns and charitys I truly believe are worthwile and are going to go to causes here in the UK, and The Sun's Help for Heroes campaign is exactly that. After Soldiers get patched up in an Army Hospital they're left to fend for themselves, often with missing limbs or other serious injuries. This campaign, together with Army chiefs, is all about saving them from being forced back onto our streets with little hope of a decent future.

These are the boys that fight for our country, that fight in wars that they don't want to be in, but they still go out and risk their lives on the Battlefield. And when the worst happens, our government doesn't support them as they should, but the British Public have been and still do, so support this, even if you just buy a Help for Heroes wristband. As Ross Kemp said "Nobody deserves your charity more than they do".

Check out the website
Check out the latest campaign

This song pretty much sums up my life.

2009-03-31T00:55:00.000+01:00

Have you heard about the new Viagra eyedrops? Apparently they make you look hard.

2009-03-28T19:26:00.006Z

The title has nothing to do with this blog, it just made me giggle today.

You know how in England, accents seem to get stronger as you go north. Southerner's don't have an accent, it's just how things sound when they're pronounced properly. But then you head up Norfolk way, up to Yorkshire, Scouser land, Geordies etc. Ok then, how come in Wales it gets stronger as you go South. I spent 10 hours in Llandudno yesterday and not once did I hear one proper Welsh accent, and I actually think the Welsh accent is quite hot. The only Welsh accent I heard was the receptionist at the Travellodge, and that was in Crewe!

Got to see Mount Snowdon which was quite nice, over the back of Llandudno, watching it slowly disappear in the clouds as dusk fell, wish i'd had my camera to be honest. It's really made me look forward to the Lakes in August, family holiday with lots of walking, I think I better hit the gym again.

I've been to Wales twice in the past two weeks, and still haven't heard anyone speaking Welsh. It's all over their road signs, like someones got bored and just thought "let's still tons of letters together and call it a Lay By, or a Service Station", I swear not even the Welsh have a clue what any of the signs say, do they still teach it in Schools over there? They must....I did spend a fair bit of the journey yesterday trying to figure out how these signs could possibly mean what they did mean, they didn't even moderatly look like anything in English, as I say, it just looked like tons of letters thrown together by some bored sheep shagger, I mean Welshman. I really should stop calling them sheep shaggers, it's not very nice, most of them prefer Horses.

Anywho, no rest for the wicked, Eastbourne for me tonight.

P.S. Hi Mum, she's recently discovered my blog, thought I should say Hello. Also Hello to everybody else. 470 Visitors in 3 weeks, that's really good! Also good to know i'm not just talking to myself.

"You don't expect to be taken nearly over a cliff."

2009-03-25T10:55:00.005Z

Can i direct you to this link? Subsequently I'd like someone to explain to me where peoples common sense has gone. Yes, alot of us trust our sat navs, and yes they are brilliant devices that make life alot easier. But you know what, they're going to start writing in the instruction manuals "Drivers must also use their eyes rather than just the Sat Nav", i'm sure Health and Safety will be on at TomTom to do that soon!

I mean who on earth would not open up their eyes and realise that clearly this isn't a main road taking you where you want to go, and oh there's not a 100ft cliff in front of you. It was good to read in this article that the driver (complete tosser probably, but I only make that presumption because he's driving a BMW) was prosecuted for driving without due care and attention. After a nine hour period of recovering the vehicle...otherwise know as wasting Police time because it seems people are turning even more lazy and losing their common sense.

When you think you've seen it all, there's always something else!

Can we have some different news now please?

2009-03-23T20:03:00.002Z

This is bound to shock and annoy some people but i'm sure they'll understand once they think about it. A year ago, she was a hated racist b***h who was constantly slagged off in the press, today she's a hero and is being compared to Princess Diana. Don't get me wrong, I think she's been very courageous and my best wishes go out to all her family, but she isn't and never will be another Princess Diana.

As to the 26 page feature on Jade, her life and her legacy, I can't remember the last time when a news story took up over half of the newspaper, I don't think even the September 11th terrorist attacks managed it. Clearly Gordon Brown has nothing better to do, however I think David Cameron said exactly what should be said: "Her brave fight has raised awareness of this terrible disease. Her legacy will be to save young women in the future".

Before the people start getting on at me saying I have no heart etc. I'd never wish Cancer or death on anyone, Jade did all the right things, her boys are looked after and she's raised a tremdnous amount of support for treating Cervical Cancer, and that shows in the rise in Smear Tests. But how can you go from being a wannabe celebrity, showing off all your glory (literally) in the Big Brother house, to being racist and thrown out of the Celeb BB house....and then being totally slagged off in all the papers, having people hate you....through to now suddenly becoming the new Princess Diana.

What I will end on is saying R.I.P. Jade, and sending my best wishes to her boys. Along with appreciating how much awareness she did raise in her seemingly quite short battle with Cervical Cancer.

I think I over did it a bit!

2009-03-22T19:48:00.002Z

On Friday, I decided to encorporate a 10minute weight training programme into my exercise routine at the gym. It didn't hurt too much yesterday, but I literally just fell into bed last night, and today the whole of my upper body just aches.

When I say aches, I can't actually straighten my arms! Impressed with Deep Heat though, it did work straight away and definitly relieved the pain and helped me move a bit more. I think maybe I need to warm up my upper body a bit more before doing it and reduce the weight training! Didn't even over do it! I feel like I wasn't watching the England rugby game yesterday, but in the middle of it all being pushed about.

It's also not good because i've got a big show fit up to do in Eastbourne tomorrow, which you can guarentee will include alot of heavy lifting. Anyone know any good sports massage therapists or any other remadys? I think a radox muscle soothing bath is in order! At least typing doesn't hurt, so facebook and internet is still good for me....i think.

Forget Oxford, Let's go Urban!

2009-03-20T19:45:00.002Z

1. Your Name?
Adam
A guy with this name is amazing. he is adorable and very caring person. he will always be there for you. he might have the nickname goober. he can make you laugh no matter what,even if ur having the worst day ever. some people may call him weird or strange, but if he wasnt all of those things then he wouldn't be goober. he is a remarkable person,trustworthy, and an awesome friend.

2. Your Age?
18
The day your life officially ends.

3. One of your friends or relatives?
Adrian
A very cocky, wannabe genius. Someone most would consider highly arrogant and self-centered. Known to be intelligent, though most can't see what he sees in himself. -- haha sorry Adrian!

4. What should you be doing?
Nothing
Actually means "something," but is used when you don't feel like explaining.

5. Favourite Colour?
Black
black. a colour. Even though african americans are considerd "black" they really arent. there brownish kinda colour.

6. Birthplace?
Kettering

Town in northampton, ruined by the fact of it being closely related with CorbyWell known for its rivalry against the Corby towners. Popular for numerous amount of chavs, of which most commonly are about 4ft tall and there vocabulary reaching only to the extent of 'ennit', 'fookin' grebs' and 'i'll proper bang you out!' Not only is there a vast number of chavs in the town - these are accompanied by the grebs. However, the only way you will pass these is if you dare to enter the lears of 'greb gardens', 'morrisons', or 'downtown subway'. If you are one of the many teens to fortnightly visit 'Keystone Escape' for there music gigs then you'll know what i mean when i say that Kettering is overrun by the 'scene' era. Try a Thursday night at 'Keystone' for the chance to be abused by about 50 of the 4ft chavs. Well, in addition to the youths of Kettering, you've got; litter, the rude and inconsiderate elderly, graffiti, vandalism, lack of good shops, the permenant stench, and my goodness the list could go on.

7. Month of your Birthday?
June
The month the hottest people in the world are born.

8. Last Person you talked to?
Mum
a word which dickhead americans can't spell, and claim we spell wrong - despite the fact that WE invented the language, and the idiots WE sent to america couldn't spell.

9. What did you last drink?
Diet Coke
A drink that is to be ordered after ordering a large, unhealthy meal. As opposed to regular soda, diet soda contains no calories, sodium, carbs or sugar.

10. Your Nickname
Mini Me!
little short dude who says "eee"

Commiserations to the Austrian Tax Payer

2009-03-19T18:50:00.003Z

I was pleased to hear today that Josef Fritzl, the Austrian bloke who locked his daughter in a celler and raped her, eventually fathering like 7 kids off of her was sentanced to life in prison. Personally I think he should be hung from a tree in the Austrian Alps by his bollocks, than have to force the Austrian tax payer to keep this man in a mental hospital for the rest of his life. Why bother putting him on suicide watch? Not much of a loss if he does kill himself, at least then his family and the world will be free of such a monster.

Another sad death of a fantastic actress this week. One of the first films I ever bought was Parent Trap with Natasha Richardson and Lindsay Lohan in it, actually the first time I started to have a little celeb crush on Lohan. It will be a great loss to the movie world, but at the same time a harsh reminder that no matter how minor, a head injury should always be checked out, even if it looks as though there's no damage at first. Rest in Peast Natasha.

Finally to lighten the mood a tad, here's one that'll make you laugh;

A woman brings eight-year-old Johnny home and tells his mother that he was caught playing doctors and nurses with Mary, her eight-year-old daughter.

Johnny's mother says, "Let's not be too harsh on them.... they are bound to be curious about sex at that age."

"Curious about sex?" replies Mary's mother. "He's taken her fucking appendix out!"

12 Days Later...

2009-03-17T22:15:00.003Z

You're either sitting there eagerly waiting for the next blog and wondering where i've disappeared to, or you probably couldn't care. I guess the latter. But thanks to the wonderful British Telecom, i've been without internet and telephone for 12 days. They got the wrong end of the stick and cut off the wrong telephone number, rather than our old number they cut off the new one. Then subsequently admitted it was their fault and basically told us that they weren't prepared to try and do anything and we'd just have to wait like anybody, even though they completely cocked up. And then gave us a different number despite telling us we'd have the same number.

To top it off, Plus Net then go and reconnect our internet to the wrong phone line, despite us making it absolutly clear to them that it needs to be on the new number. At least plus net did give us compensation and the next bill free, as for BT...well they've offered us nothing, which is why a rather snotty letter is now making it's way to BT HQ in central London.

On a rather different note, it was nice to get out and marshall the 25th Hastings Half Marathon this weekend. A lovely day for it, not ideal conditions, there was a considerable amount of runners going down through dehydration, and I know the Red Cross had their hands full. But well done to the organisers, a great day all round. Finally, i'd just like to say thanks to all the drivers who had patience and didn't shout or swear at Marshalls, it really does matter, after all we are all volunteers. There are always a few drivers who will have a go at you, despite the signs being up for 6 weeks beforehand, either they're blind, stupid or very disorganised...probably all three. Especially to the one man, who i'm saying very little as it's an ongoing Police Investigation now, who decided to try to ram me with his car. I think he'll be thinking twice about his actions when the nice police officer knocks on his door tomorrow.

Anyway, I must get on with my list of things to do on the internet....you have no idea how much i've missed my web access.

Oh not a yank, give up now.

2009-03-03T17:09:00.003Z

So my iPod returned from Apple Care today, not that they do care...As I thought, they'd pointed their little maglite down the headphone jack to find that it was telling them it had water damage, and yeah apart from fiddle with the brightness control, that's all they actually did.

I phoned up the helpline, up for an argument, to be answered by some yank woman asking my name. How my name matters to the whole matter I don't know, would have expected them to ask for a reference or serial number, but not my name. As soon as I heard this woman I just thought "I'm not even going to bother". She told me that they'd charge me "£116" to fix it, to which i replied that I may as well buy a new one, and I ended the conversation there.

I could go up to the Apple shop at Bluewater and argue with them, but at the end of the day all they're going to say is that its got water damage cause the "sensor" says so, not that it's ever been anywhere near water. I'd much rather do without the argument and just buy a new one. So that's what i've done.

I like the iPod Touch, it's a really good device, the best on the market and fairly well priced. But after all this if I could i'd much rather go onto another device, if only it wasn't for DRM protected music. Bloody iTunes.

A little video to pass the time...

2009-03-03T00:00:00.002Z

I was going to blog about something else today, but thought i'd give you something different. So here's a little motivational video which made me smile today.

You're charging me how much? for what?

2009-02-26T11:25:00.003Z

Just phoned my insurance company, apparently a good deal better, to change my address...a bit late I know, for them to then go and tell me that my insurance premium will change cause I live in a slightly nicer area, and that it'd also cost me £13 administration charges. Sorry, but what administration charges are involved in typing a few things into a computer, printing something out and posting it. Maybe £2's worth?

So i've just had to pay out £40 for basically nothing. A job I was more than willing to do from home if need be. Noone else has charged me for change of address, bloody insurance companies!!

On another note, the man from Autoglass is currently replacing my windscreen, to which my insurance company have said that once i've paid my £60 excess it won't cost me anything and won't affect my no claims bonus. Why don't I believe them? Anyway, the man from Autoglass is not as nice as they are in the radio ads. Autoglass repair - Autoglass replace and all that.

Swansea and Northampton this weekend for me. Time to go sign away my life, and check out my new sparkling windscreen.

Laugh It Up

2009-02-25T00:17:00.004Z

A highly amusing night at Venue M seeing Laugh It Up, a comedy club, for the first time. The headline act being the above photoed Paul Sinha. Who quite amusingly had seen me at the interval, seen what I was wearing, and then seen where I was sitting...to then go on and pick on me during the show and tell me that I was everything he looked for in a bloke.

I'm all laughed out now, a great night.

Further posts to come when I think of what to blog about, it's not that easy you know!!!

You're driving on a Motorway - Did you know that?

2009-02-17T19:51:00.004Z

Have you ever been driving along a motorway and seen one of these stupid signs or messages pointing out the blatantly obvious. Having put them up, Highways Agencys officials clearly feel the need to plaster patronising slogans all over them.

Yes there is fog, congratulations. And why is it that whenever there's heavy fog outside the car, we feel the need to lean forwards nearer to the windscreen, as if the fog is in fact inside the car!

Best one I saw when we had the snow was SNOW - DRIVE WITH CARE. How thick do they think we drivers are? Actually, don't answer that one.

Then there's the ones that say Don't drink/eat/phone/sleep while you're driving. There's some bloke on minimum wage, who's come in on the bus, sitting in the Highways Agency office thinking "I wonder what sh*t I can put on the signs today".

I wonder what we did before we had people pointing out the obvious.

Top Ten Songs from West End Musicals

2009-02-16T12:00:00.000Z

As promised, here are my Top Ten Songs from West End Musicals:

Under Pressure - We Will Rock You
Come so far (Got so far to go) - Hairspray
Dancing Through Life - Wicked
Do you hear the people sing? - Les Miserables
There's a fine fine line - Avenue Q
Honey, Honey - Mamma Mia
I want to break free - We Will Rock You
Everyone's a little bit racist - Avenue Q
Any Dream Will Do - Joseph and the Amazing Technicolour Dreamcoat
The Sound of Music - The Sound of Music

My Dad sometimes gives me £10

2009-02-13T16:15:00.004Z

It was hard for me to miss this story on the front page of "The Sun" today. It's all about 13-year-old Alfie Pattern who had a one night stand at the age of twelve with 14-year-old girlfriend Chantelle Steadman. This kid's voice hasn't even broken and he's barely out of short trousers, yet he's a father to little baby Maisie.

Sussex Police's Child Protection Division said today "It is not in anyone's interests for a prosecution to take place. Sussex Police Child Protection Team were aware of a 14-year-old girl that had become pregnant as the result of a relationship with a 12-year-old boy". It is now being called for a prosecution to be made against Alfie. Am I the only person that thinks this boy isn't at fault. Firstly, this is another example of "Broken Britain", She lives with her jobless father and five other brothers in a council house, funded by us! He comes from a mother and father who are divorced, and now lives in 3 seperate houses. That says it all. Secondly, he was only 12, and in my books that consitutes as a kid who has barely had any sex education and wouldn't know what he was doing. A fourteen year old girl on the other hand, who in todays world, is perfectly aware of sex etc. She is the one that should be getting prosecuted for this.

Who is now going to be looking after this child, this family, and when she leaves school unemployed....wait it'll be us, the British taxpayer! Where were the parents when this was all going on? Why were they letting their children, especially a young boy of 12, to have unprotected underage sex?! Apparently Alfie's dad sometimes gives him a tenner for sweets, something tells me he's going to need ALOT more than that. Why was Chantelle prescribed the pill at fourteen? I'm sure both families will be struggling to make sense of what's happened and what the future is, as are we all!

I wonder how long Alastair Darling will take for this years budget, I mean how long does it take to say "We are F*****d".

Many saw evil, They dared to stop it.

2009-02-12T15:56:00.005Z

World War II has always been an interest of mine, it's just something that fascinates me; I can read hundreds of articles and such to do with it for hours upon hours. I think it's just the incredible fact that humans could do this, and this could happen, you just physically can't imagine it.

Anyway, that's the main reason why I wanted to go and see Valkyrie when it was coming out. It's a true story about the courage of a group of men who could see what was happening under Hitler's regime, and their subsequent attemps to put an end to it and find some truce to World War II. Now I won't go deep into history, but the film follows these men, and specifically one of these men; "Colonel Claus von Stauffenberg" as they take part in the fifth and final attempt to assasinate Adolf Hitler.

Many reviewers of this film seem too interested in Tom Cruise, and his performance, which is not what the film is about. These sorts of films must be very hard to direct, because from the start the audience know the ending, and that can ruin the way. But the writers and directors of the film did brilliantly to keep the tense atmosphere, and pack the film with strong performances and tasty actions scenes.

This film is a true depiction of World War II, and a group of mens brave fights to bring back a Germany that they can remember. An utterly fascinating story which is easily watchable, even for those of us who aren't great movie buffs. A must watch

A small fact for you: The entire cast and crew started every night of filming on Bendler Block with a moment of silence in memory of Stauffenberg.

Another thing I noted, not related to the film, but how much money have the Beeb got to be advertising in cinemas. Too Much!

25 Things about Me - Taken from Facebook

2009-02-09T21:21:00.001Z

I think i've got the best job in the world, and actually love going to work.
There are a large number of people in life who i tolerate, but don't really like.
I absolutly hate letting people down and will beat myself up for months for doing it
I think relgion and god is utter bollocks, all in peoples heads, and causes more trouble than it solves.
Tea is the best drink in the world, anything can be solved over a nice cuppa.
I've never been in a relationship on Valentines Day
I have alot of good friends, but I don't have a best friend.
The future scares the shit out of me
I am the most organised person in this world
I'm like a tortoise, i put up a hard shell, but inside i'm unbelievably soft and caring.
I can play guitar, just not very well.
I was always fascinated by people in the days of Myspace who left bulletins asking people to 'comment their pics' because it's basically the equivalent of telling everyone you are a complete loser.
The labour government, specifically Gordon Brown, have totally screwed this country up, so i'm voting for change.
I actually don't like drinking alcohol, it has no interest. I'd rather stay sober and do something with my evening.
I'm scared of spiders and being alone.
People think i'm lying cause I giggle when confronted, in fact i'm usually being totally honest, and just can't help it.
If I could stay in Hastings for the rest of my life I would.
I believe university would be a waste of 3 years of my life, so am going to continue living it.
I've been pulled over for driving while under the influence of drink, yet gotten away with it. Never ever again, it really scares you.
I miss my Rugby playing days, and will get back to it all one day.
If my current career fails, i'll join the Police.
Noone, not even my parents, know the real me.
I can get slightly OCD about things, for example checking time after time that my alarm is set
I hate Facebook cause its so addictive.
You'll never find a person more straightforward and honest. I'll tell you just how it is, whether its what you want to hear or not.

Top Tens

2009-02-09T12:00:00.001Z

Every Monday, i'll be publishing my top ten songs of something. It could be music, rock, cheese etc. It's just something different, and why not just do something similar, have a wizz through your ipod and pick out those favourite tunes. It's not as easy as you think it is. Here's my first one...My Top Ten Songs of All Time!

1 - Guns n Roses - Sweet Child of Mine
2 - Aerosmith - I don't want to miss a thing
3 - S Club 7 - Never had a dream come true
4 - Lonestar - Amazed
5 - The Beatles - Let It Be
6 - Bryan Adams & Melanie C - When you're Gone
7 - McFly - I'll be Okay
8 - Bill Medley & Jennifer Warnes - I've had the time of my life
9 - Go West - We Close Our Eyes
10 - Queen - I want to Break Free

Applying common sense, logic and toothpaste

2009-02-08T18:43:00.005Z

On the way to find a pub in Folkestone, we got pulled to one side by a couple of attractive young ladies (part of the reason why we stopped) who were from a local church, one of these new ones that are popping up all over the place. We subsequently had a long discussion on god, and our beliefs, which did at one point turn into quite a heated debate. I think the above interview with Eddie Izzard sums up my views, and I think they are not that dissimilar to those of Izzard.

Personally, I think, as Izzard says, that by applying common sense, logic and science to religions and the belief of god I can see no reason for his existance. The earth was created by the big bang or some scientific phonomenon, which subsequently resulted in the production of micro-organisms which then developed over thousands of years into the animals around us and ourselves. The bible was written by people over time who "believed" that god was speaking to them, it wouldn't that hard for me to say right now that I "believe" that god is speaking to me and subsequently i'm off to write a book.

The church is used by alot of people as comfort, its someone there, its someone to talk to, and in times of hardship it's the belief that someone is there. Let's not generalise this though, i'm not focusing on Christianity, but all the other beliefs around the worlds that believe in a "god" or a higher being. Religions are, 90% of the time if not more, the cause of major conflicts and wars around the world.

The heated debate with these two young ladies along Folkestone seafront sort of came to an end when I turned around and said, quite honestly, "If you can prove to me that God exists then i'll believe, but at the end of the day, God is all in people's heads. Any comments will be gratefully appreciated and taken on board.

Planes, Trains and a bit of snow.

2009-02-02T18:58:00.006Z

How come this was forecast a week and a half ago, yet its shut down major transport links, airports have been closed, and there has been no end of car crashes. Yes, maybe this is the first time in 18 years this has happened, and we don't get it alot, but places like Heathrow Airport I would have thought would have been ready for such incident. And they would have runways and taxiways cleared to enable planes to move about. But no, 6 inches of snow and the entire country shuts down.

Then we've got people who turn around and say "oh even though I only work 10-15minutes down the road, I can't get there". I managed to get to the dentists and around Hastings today, and I even went up to the gym, don't tell me you can't get to work. People who use trains and buses have a fair reason.

£1.2 billion has been lost today. This country should have been better prepared, and people shouldn't be so lazy. But no matter what you think it's pretty damn lovely to wake up to and look at. Now it'd be nice for it to go away.

*Photo copyright to the BBC by the way. They're probably not getting enough money from the TV licences at the moment and in the very slim event of them seeing this, they're likely to sue. Nothing any good to watch on there anyway*

It'll ruin the view

2009-01-28T22:46:00.002Z

A year and a half ago this bloke took what was probably the bravest decision of his life, and that was to fight for his Queen and Country in the Helmand Province of Afghanistan. Now his legs were blown off by a taliban mine and his local council have turned around the told him that he can't have his specially adapted bungalow built on his grandfathers land because it "might spoil the view".

Neighbours agreed but when it came down to the penpushers sitting round a table in the Council Chamber, his circumstances were "not considered sufficient". This is utterly ridiculous, and once again shows the lack of support we give to our troops. These men and women are risking their lives every minute they are at war for less money than most of us earn on a daily basis. It disgusts me that we can't support them when they return.

The bungalow, including a therapy room, would have been hidden from the road at Hankham, East Sussex. It would have enabled him to leave the Forces rehab centre at Headley Court, Surrey, and live independently. This kid is never ever going to have the same life he had before he entered the Marines, yet he won't be compensated for it.

I vote we force these councillers to go and fight for King and Country, and see what they say when they come back with limbs blown off. I'm sure they'd be the first to complain.

Should have smacked him harder!

2009-01-26T20:58:00.003Z

It's come out in the past week that this guardsmen smacked this bloke in the back of head for mimicking his actions. Personally I think he should have hit this foreign tosser harder! It's about time we started respecting the people who enforce rules and protect this country, whether you be home grown or just visiting.

These people are the creme de la creme of our armed forces, and who spend hours upon end marching from point to point to protect our royalty putting up with endless twats like this. I have nothing but respect for all members of the British Armed Forces. And I certainly hope that this will teach this prick (who is apparently an oxford student) some respect next time!

If you want to see the video then click here

Canal, Brothel, Drugs, Canal, Brothel, Drugs, Canal.....

2009-01-25T18:14:00.005Z

After sleeping for 14 hours last night/this morning, I feel it is now time to give my verdict on Amsterdam, which will shortly be followed by a brief slideshow. I know how thrilling you are all finding the experience of reading this so i'll keep it brief. Firstly I was quite impressed by the ferry across to Rotterdam, it was fairly quiet, not overly priced and very comfortable. All the staff seemed very happy and it was a very pleasant journey. The Pride of Hull, I suppose someone has to be proud of Hull. However, I would have though that a reputable company such as P&O would have employed a Sound/Lighting technician for the on board entertainment. But no, instead it was left down to a performer. I'm sure you can envisage what came next. All the shows was plagued with technical issues, every time the singer came on during the caberet her microphone wasn't live. The band were mixing from one stage, ok there's nothing wrong with doing that but it's a bit cheap and doesn't sound as good as it could.

Secondly, Amsterdam, it's exactly what you see in the photos and in the movies, no different. But, it's surprisingly small, I managed to cover the majority of the city centre in the space of 2 hours, after which I couldn't find much else to do unless you wanted to shag some old black bird for 50 euros or smoke some jamaican stuff. I visited Anne Frank's house, which was the best part of the day, everything is still the original house, and it's very very moving. I think it's been done brilliantly and it was great to see something that i've heard so much about. To relieve the boredom I went on a canal cruise in the afternoon which was very interesting and showed you lots more of Amsterdam along with telling you lots of information about the city's history.

Despite getting a little bored towards the afternoon and that it also began to quite heavily rain. It was a very good day, and an even better boat ride. I don't think i'd go there again on a tourist visit, but I would definitly go to Amsterdam for a stag do or a lads weekend, which I suppose is what most of the tourists will do.

My Cabin

The bathroom - which had the nicest shower ever, very nice after a long day in Amsterdam

It highly amused me that P&O had gaffa taped the projector (which wasn't aligned right anyway & it was shit) to the FOH lighting bar.

The main entertainment lounge and bar, too floors with an irish bar upstairs.

Coming into Rotterdam

The main square in Amsterdam, big royal palace behind me.

Let's bomb Bradford!

2009-01-24T18:33:00.002Z

I shall blog more tomorrow when i'm abit more awake and have photos uploaded too.

In the meantime i've developed a theory...this is that Osama Bin Laden is in fact alive and living in Bradford. I say that we bomb the place, if he isn't there, then honestly what have we lost?

Barack Obama

2009-01-20T13:18:00.002Z

Can I be the first englishman to say that I really couldn't give a flying fuck about Barack Obama or anything. So much i've turned the TV and Radio off, and put my iPod on...something i do care about, something decent to listen to.

I'll say one thing though, and if i'm wrong you can tell me a year from now. I think there will at least be an attempt, maybe successful, to assassinate Barack Obama within the next year. As much as America keeps saying "We're ready for change", whether you like it or not, to some extent Racism does exist over there, and I just don't think they're ready for a black president. Remember that only 40 years ago black people weren't allowed to mix with white people.

The deep south is still like this and there are a large number of americans who are against change, and are quite racist. Noone, not even the Americans themselves can deny this. I think Obama will hit bumpy times. I quite like the bloke and think he will be very good for the states, and I do wish him all the best. But I do think there will at least be an attempt to assassinate him which will lead to major conflicts in the United States.

We're looking at the start of World War III, but i'll talk about that in a later blog post.

Bodybuilder's are obese...

2009-01-19T15:44:00.004Z

...Or at least that's what you're doctor will tell you when your BMI is calculated. BMI is calculated by taking a person's weight and dividing by their height squared. Now this is absolute bollocks if you ask me. It's been scientifically proven that muscle weighs twice as much as fat. So how can someone turn around to a body builder and say you need to lose weight because you're classed as obese. BMI is wrong, and in my opinion shouldn't be widely used by the NHS as a measurement for obesity.

You might have a body fat percentage of 8% with a lot of added muscle, and the body mass index chart will say you are obese, and could be a risk for significant health issues. On the other hand, suppose you’ve never exercised a day in your life and your body fat is 30%, but you weigh less than a fit person with an 8% level of body fat. The BMI chart might suggest your weight is right where it should be and you are at very little risk for health problems. This is where the BMI chart is misleading. Recent studies have shown a weak and inconsistent correlation between a high BMI and disease or early death.

A more accurate measurement of this is your waste to hip ratio. People who tend to gain weight on their arse rather than on their stomach are at an increased risk of heart related conditions, diabetes and high bloody pressure. Your health is not only affected by how much body fat you have, but also by where most of the fat is located on your body. People who tend to gain weight mostly in their hips and buttocks have roughly a pear body shape, while people who tend to gain weight mostly in the abdomen have more of an apple body shape.

Or one of the very best ways is how you feel and what you think when you look in the mirror. Simple as.

Eurovision

2009-01-18T00:39:00.003Z

Last Year, the United Kingdom got a total of 14 points, from 2 countries (San Marino...barely even a country, and Ireland), now for what reason does Lord Lloyd Webber believe this year to be different. If bloody Elvis came back from the dead and entered the eurovision for us, we still wouldn't have a chance in hell of winning it! Because it's all political.

Greece and Cyprus, Sweden and Finland, Ukraine and Belarus! The Balkans, Baltics and Scandinavian countries all vote for each other! The BBC on the other hand have seen a brilliant opportunity to fill Saturday night TV with more utter rubbish. I'm sure Webber is getting a fair wack out of the show and similar.

I think we should enter the most unlikely and shittest act ever, just for the hell of it...oh wait, that's what we've been doing for the past 5 years. The only reason I ever watched it was for the pure comic value of Terry Wogan, and now he's gone, well what other reason is there?

Oh and i've bet my Mum tonight ALL of my money that we won't even make the top three. That's how confident I am. I sincerely hope I'm not wrong!

Admiration

2009-01-16T19:07:00.002Z

Now being a geek and playing flight simulator i've often taken interested in planes and how they work. But this is something else.

When the pilot of this plane lined it up to take off at La Guardia airport in NY he'd never imagine that he'd shortly he facing a pilots worse fears, and he'd shortly be forced to make the hardest of landings ever. Hit the water with your tail too far down and you risk breaking the fuselage into pieces, hit the water with your nose too far down and you risk drowning everyone on board.

I'm sure this 57 year old former US air force pilot will be waking up today knowing that he's done his good deed of the year after saving 155 peoples lives. Well Done to him, this bloke deserves a medal!!

Welcome

2009-01-16T19:05:00.003Z

I think i've lost track of how many of these things i've opened and not actually used. This time, i'm making it a new years resolution to update them. It's easier than using facebook and more versatile, so definitly worth a go!

So Welcome and I hope this blog brings you days of thoroughly enjoyable reading.